Defining Our Values at Home and in the Classroom

On a recent evening, I saw an Instagram video of Matthew McConaughey talking about values. “Values are bi-partisan. Let’s be fair, friendly, kind, accountable—values—they never go out of style,” said the beloved actor. I agree. What is it about defining our values at home and in the classroom?

Many years ago, a wise friend explained that schools and churches hold communities together because they are the institutions charged with teaching values. In a remote world where parents opt not to send their children back to the classroom and families choose to spend Sunday mornings at home, how do we communicate values?

Media has filled the void — books, television, video games, movies, social media, and music. Media has become the predominant cultural influencer, with many voices shouting for recognition and adherence to the ideas they propose. Media is not the enemy. On the contrary, media can be used to teach values. But how?

Firstly, we must define our values. There are basic keys to being human on which we can all agree, regardless of gender, race, ethnicity, socio-economic background, religion, political affiliation, etc. Some of these basics include Courage — standing up for what is right and facing our fears; honesty — speaking and acting truthfully; and Kindness — treating others how we want to be treated. Investing the time to define the core values in our classroom, school, home, and community creates common ground. These values become the lens by which we can evaluate behavior, our own and others.

Once we have developed a common vocabulary, we can engage in meaningful conversations about current events and the media, whether at home or school. We must take the time to ask our children questions, such as “What are your thoughts about this? How does this make you feel?” Likewise, we must prioritize listening to them — what is being said and what is not being said. Therefore, we are teaching them essential communication skills along with our values.

Lastly, we must speak up. The changes we are experiencing in education and business related to diversity and equity demonstrate our power. Speaking up may mean getting involved in community leadership or creating and sharing art representing our views. In whatever way we engage, let us be sure to include our children in our process, teaching them values through our actions.

As Dr. Maurice Elias wrote in Building People: Social-Emotional Learning for Kids, Families, Schools, and Communities (2018):

“When you talk to teachers, by and large, they’ve gone into education because they want to help kids become better people. Being “better people” includes being responsible, having integrity, being cooperative and caring, and being supportive of others. When these basic values are implicit in SEL curricula, then, by its very nature, SEL suppresses bullying. When we talk about SEL 2.0, we’re not talking about something that’s value-neutral; we’re talking about philosophy and curricula with an implicit value structure linked to caring, kindness, consideration, cooperation, and mutual support. It creates a school culture and climate that exemplifies those attributes.”

SEL includes values and values equal character. Character builds better people, and better people create a more just and caring world.

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